Now I am scared.
I have never been scared of things like getting raped, robbed, stabbed, shot etc. Until about today.
I have tried to understand why this guy in Norway killed all of those people and I can't. I have no understanding for his actions at all. I read a book recently that is called 19 minutes and it was about a school shooting in the U.S. and when I finished the book I didn't think what the guy did was right in anyway but I understood that he wanted all the bullying to stop and he saw no other way. THIS I don't understand at all. Does anyone?
I am seriously upset about what have happened to all those people and I feel for their families and friends. Apparently 9393 people in Sweden will be killed by his terrorist-friends. How am I supposed to walk around now and not be scared?! I have looked at so many people today thinking: Are you planning an attack? Have I ever said something that might have pissed you off and I am on the list of the 9393 you are going to kill? It doesn't seem to matter where you are either, nowhere is safe. Not the capital, not a tiny little island in the middle of a lake. As late as Saturday I told Jamie that I want to walk home on my own at night because I want to live without being scared of something horrible happening to me. Now I am scared of sitting in the office, walking to the station, walking from the station, being in a shopping mall. I am even scared of having my own opinion, because some Swedish nazi might disagree and come and shoot me.
I know when time has passed I will feel better and not be so paranoid because I wasn't there and it is not as real for me as it was for the people in Norway, but those people will probably always be scared. And that makes me even more mad. Because what happens when he has served 14 years in prison (which I heard is the longest he can get, is that really true?!)? Will he do it all over again? Or will his so called friends have finished the job by then?
It's surreal.
I have tried to understand why this guy in Norway killed all of those people and I can't. I have no understanding for his actions at all. I read a book recently that is called 19 minutes and it was about a school shooting in the U.S. and when I finished the book I didn't think what the guy did was right in anyway but I understood that he wanted all the bullying to stop and he saw no other way. THIS I don't understand at all. Does anyone?
I am seriously upset about what have happened to all those people and I feel for their families and friends. Apparently 9393 people in Sweden will be killed by his terrorist-friends. How am I supposed to walk around now and not be scared?! I have looked at so many people today thinking: Are you planning an attack? Have I ever said something that might have pissed you off and I am on the list of the 9393 you are going to kill? It doesn't seem to matter where you are either, nowhere is safe. Not the capital, not a tiny little island in the middle of a lake. As late as Saturday I told Jamie that I want to walk home on my own at night because I want to live without being scared of something horrible happening to me. Now I am scared of sitting in the office, walking to the station, walking from the station, being in a shopping mall. I am even scared of having my own opinion, because some Swedish nazi might disagree and come and shoot me.
I know when time has passed I will feel better and not be so paranoid because I wasn't there and it is not as real for me as it was for the people in Norway, but those people will probably always be scared. And that makes me even more mad. Because what happens when he has served 14 years in prison (which I heard is the longest he can get, is that really true?!)? Will he do it all over again? Or will his so called friends have finished the job by then?
It's surreal.